let me just put it out there-
I've recently given up on my dreams. It's such a long, tough road and it seems like I make that climb so much harder than it really is. Yall know I gotta be honest. I don't even
feel like poetry. Starting over with the whole process of submitting my work for publication again is daunting and undesirable to me. I'm praying that Christ would refresh and renew my mind to get back on this journey and get back to be used as His pen to fulfill His purpose.
I'm so disappointed in myself, yet I can't even get wrapped up in that 'cause that can be a timestealer and work against me. So I'm surrounding myself w/poetry again. Me and her are getting reaccquainted. Seems like this is the 1000th time I've began again. But If I don't get up, I'll get ran over...along w/my dreams..crushed..like dust. I CAN'T let that happen.
So I gotta talk to myself and I gotta read again. And I've gotta write again(thankful for this blog,even). And I gotta pray for courage, strength, resolve, determination, belief, drive, confidence, desire and a whole slew of things.
I don't like the fact that I've been at this place so many times before. When I think about the time that I've wasted...my Lord is soon to come again and what have I done with the beautiful and divine gifts He's deposited into me? I will have to answer for this.
A minister just recently mentioned that we should think about how our sin affects the Kingdom of God. It is a sin to not honor God's purpose and will for my life. God confirmed to me last week in church that this life's work is not for ME! It's for others!!! God help me. Help me to stop being selfish and lazy. Help me to honor all that you've loaned to me. Please help me God.
strip me of every excuse
empower me to take step after step
help me to honor you oh my Lord!
Labels: honor
