And my Heavenly Father does it again

I praise You Jesus!

Just as I noted in my blog yesterday that Christ would work on me & meet me right where I am, so He did just that yesterday in Sunday church service. Should I have expected anything different? Isn't His track record impeccable & perfect? I admit I was surprised that it happened this fast.
Saturday evening I set my clock to rise & hour b4 church. I had made up my mind to go, even though I wasn't feeling cool with my Lord. But when Sunday crept in my window & I heard that buzz, I thought twice about going. I rolled over, pressed the snooze & fell on back into dreamland. Only the phone rings from my sistafriend woke me back up. She had changed her mind & wanted to attend service w/me! I was delighted. I enjoy our friendship so much & we love visiting this church together in Cheltenham Township. So that was all I needed to be on my way. Of course, that shouldn't have been my motivation-but nevertheless it was.
Unfortunately I still went to church expecting nothing. I figured I'd get my praise on(I dislike that statement so!) and say hi to a few folk and roll out; unaffected & unchanged. I didn't really like feeling that way, but that's where I was. And my Jesus knew it. So I'm sitting there & listening to the Word and I begin to realize that God has sent me a personal Word. That He had tailored this message just for me. I couldn't believe it. I actually didn't want to be comforted & I had an attitude of skepticism while listening. But it became clear & undeniable.
The preacher said that God said that "Moses is dead" and for Joshua to go on and lead the Israelites farther on to their destination. Now I didn't think anything of that when I heard it-pertaining to my situation. But God began to show me that my "old" situation..the job that hurt me so..was dead. In the past. OVER. And that I was to move on to the next level of what God has for me. That I was not to "look back"-which is what I've been doing ever since I got news of the new job. Of course I had a little private arguement with the Lord right there in the pew. I'm like "God, I'm trying to move on. I've been for months, moving on in my singing and poetry career. But now, you've pulled me back into what I've left behind". What do you have to say about that Lord??? lol...My precious Jesus just came back gently, attuned my ears to let me hear that he was saying "My child, I don't want you to compare this new situation w/the old. Just b/c it's another office job, doesn't mean it's the same thing. It's not and you are not the same person. I've changed you and you are to go forth in all I've taught you through the fire and walk into a new & higher place in me. Wherever I say go, then go."
WOW! I thought. I had no retort or come back for that! I praised God and quietly asked for a complete surrender in my heart, mind, soul, body & spirit to His will. He was so gentle with me. I'm still reveling in it & thanking Him. God knows just where to touch you and just how to touch you. Also, I obviously haven't moved on if I'm experiencing all of these negative feelings now. I must take trust in the fact that God knows I need more healing and He has chosen His best way for me to arrive at that place of wholeness. True-it is not what I would've chosen for myself. But nevertheless, thy will be done Lord.
I feel so good that I can be myself with Christ and don't have to cook anything up or pretend that I don't feel a certain way. He really does accept me for who I am. Every so often He reminds me of that wonderful truth.
So, I go forward. Keeping in mind to pray for myself and use these 2 last weeks of freedom to accomplish some more things I want to bring forth. God has been teaching me to manage my time and I will continue to be a student in that classroom. He is transforming my mind and heart right before my eyes and it's an amazing thing to feel and behold. God, where in the heck would I be without You?! Who would I be? A lost soul...drifting & self-destructive with no purpose.
Thank you Jesus for daily being my Saviour and continuing to mold my clay with your golden hands.

I love You.