WINGS

Last night I had this longggg conversation w/one of my cousin's. We had to be on the horn for at least 2.5 hours. Now, for me..this is not a stretch..I just love divine fellowship over the phone. Unfortunately my ghetto phone will only allow about 3 hours until it's starts beeping and shuts down on me..lol.
So we were talking, and you know how you're small talking and before long the convo is in knee deep to some heavy things? well that's how it was. Alot of times in the past when that's happened, the Holy Spirit revealed to me that it was a divine appointment over the phone. In other words He ordained that conversation to happen..before I was even born. amazing!! I love it.
Things dipped and dived and we just began to share w/one another some high and low altitudes of our lives. I divulged a whole lot and I felt safe to do that. At times I did wonder if I was talking too much or just being too open, but I knew that was me tripping and that the convo was divinely administered and led. So I kept on.
Eventually we wrapped things up(b/c the phone was beeping). No sooner had I got off and put the phone down, did the tears start coming in droves. I couldn't even believe I was reacting this way. It took me totally by surprise. I lifted my hands and just praised God and cried and worshipped Him. I couldn't stop. It was clear the Holy Spirit had me hemmed up in the bathroom! lol

What I hadn't yet realized is that He was healing me through praise and worship and song and tears. As I was talking, I was kinda reliving everything but from the standpoint of who I now am in Him, and I was able to look at the person I used to be. Hurt, confused, low on self and not in fellowship w/Christ. I was able to look at her and cry for her and love her and hug her. And all this was happening in the spiritual realm while I was talking. So when the convo ended..all that He was doing in me , just poured forth. I wasn't crying or even feeling sad while I talked, so that's why my reaction surprised me.
I thought about all Jesus has done for me. All that He snatched me from to save and preserve my life. All that tried to take me out of here and if it wasn't for His chasing after me and pursuing me and wooing me? I'd be doomed. And the thing is He drew me to Him, when I wasn't even bothering w/Him. I had my back turned and it was all about me. I mean what kind of amazing love is that? I can't comprehend it, but I thank Him.
When I finished talking, my cousin coudn't even believe that I was talking about me and how I used to be. The things I suffered through and the miracle that I am now. Oh it just floors me! (let me wrap this up, cause I'm fallling asleep..lol)
Wings is what God was spreading out on my back. As I cried and remembered, God increased my wingspan. HALLELUJAH.

So cry yall. get it out..let Him work on you.
It's always for your growth and for His gold.
and it's worth it all
Christ is worth it all!